Recent Articles

  • Whitmer Locks Down Michigan Polls Over Alarming Spike In Republicans, Will Reopen At 2 AM For Essential Ballots Only
  • Harvard Students Occupy Polling Place, Demand It Divest From Voting
  • Seattle City Council Abolishes Line At Polling Place As Inequitable, Everyone Now Votes At Once In A Large Pile
  • Joe Biden Shows Up To Vote, Proudly Casts Ballot For Himself In 1972 Senate Race
  • Barbra Streisand Clones Her Dog 4,000 More Times To Knock On Doors For House Democrats
  • Hochul Taxes Every Wing At Buffalo Sports Bar During Bills Game, By The Fourth Quarter The Bar Has Moved To Florida
  • Angie Nixon Floats To Cuba On Flamingo Pool Toy To See If It's A Dictatorship, Passes Raft Full Of Cubans Paddling The Other Way
  • Iowa Democrat Sets Out To Find Southern Border With Sled Dogs, Pith Helmet And DNC Map Marked 'Here Be Dragons'
  • Democrats' $4 Million Anti-AI Ad Accidentally Stars Grandma Who Is Clearly Six Toasters In A Cardigan
  • Brandon Johnson Campaign Defends Photocopied Petition Signatures As Proof Chicagoans Love Him So Much They Signed Twice
  • Democratic Operatives Who Combed Alaska For Every Man Named Dan Sullivan Insist They Were Just Planning A Big Family Reunion
  • Kamala Harris Urges Georgians To Vote On Tuesday, A Day Unburdened By The Monday That Has Been
  • Gen Z Man Six Hours Into DMV Wait Says This Is Exactly Why Government Should Run Everything
  • Snopes Rates Neighbor Kid's Spider-Man Costume 'Mostly False'
  • Vegan Whose House Got Egged Unsure Whether To Be Angrier About The House Or The Eggs
  • Newsom Excited For Halloween, Already Has A Different Face Ready For Every House
  • Mamdani Fines Brooklyn Man For Handing Out Full-Size Candy Bars, Calls It Flaunting Wealth In Front Of Children
  • Democrats' Midterm Blue Wave Was Going To Be Huge Until They Taxed It Down To A Ripple
  • California High-Speed Rail CEO Resigns After Audit Finds $593,000 In Travel, None Of It By Train
  • Alaska Senate Forum Descends Into Chaos After Moderator Asks Real Dan Sullivan To Please Stand Up
  • Democrats Warn Federal Election Monitors May Intimidate Voters By Watching
  • Bernie Sanders Demands Pause On AI After ChatGPT Asks Why He Owns Three Houses
  • Washington Post Election-Denial Tracker Crashes After Intern Feeds It The Paper's 2016 Archive
  • Mamdani, Hochul Aides Alarmed To Find Queens Family Surviving Entirely On Money It Earned
  • Karen Bass Asks LA Voters For Second Term, Promises To Be In The Country For This One
  • Hakeem Jeffries Warns Republicans Are Plotting 'Diabolical Scheme' To Win Elections By Getting More Votes
  • Kamala Harris Explains What An Inning Is To Milwaukee Bar Until Nobody There Knows Anymore
  • Grandma Who Just Wanted To Look At Grandson's Phone Has Now Ordered 40 Pounds Of Birdseed And A Jet Ski
  • Mail Carrier Needs Machete To Reach Porch Through Neighbor's Yard Sign Collection
  • Travis Kelce Flagged For Excessive Choreography After Touchdown Dance Runs Into Fourth Quarter